sickos

We had a rough night again, but not for no reason. Nick got home from work last night and wasn't feeling well. Not long after, we heard Kylee crying, so he went in and put her back to bed. Again, she cried and this time when he got in there, she started to throw up. Yuck. Thank goodness he was home because I don't do well with puking. A little while later, it was him throwing up. They both had some stomach bug, but it didn't seem to last long. Elijah was up all night screaming. I think one of his bottom molars is bothering him. I noticed it was really swollen yesterday. Poor boy. I did well till about 5:30 when I'd had very little sleep and I just couldn't take the screaming anymore. I just left him in his bed because I couldn't do it. I had hit that point of exhaustion and that was it. Nick got up and sat in by his bed till he went back to sleep. I felt terrible that he had to get up. I was just going to let him scream it out.

Today they seem better, but we stayed home from church anyway. Nick's still not 100%, but Kylee seems to be. She's been acting like nothing was ever wrong with her. Nick's mom invited us for dinner and when I said we couldn't, she offered to go to the store for us so we didn't need to. I gave her the list of things we needed and she brought that and then a few extras. She also brought a sticker/coloring book for Kylee and a puzzle for Elijah. That was nice of her. She did well and asked before she gave them to Kylee just in case we didn't want her using the stickers.

So far I've folded 6 loads of laundry, and I still have more to go. We've watched "What Happens in Vegas" and we're currently watching "Tombstone." Nick has wanted me to watch "Tombstone" for a while, but I always fell asleep. Today I did it while folding laundry so I stayed awake through it. I've missed a few parts here and there because I've switched laundry and gone to the bathroom. Not a bad movie. I still like my girlie movies better, though.

Well, Elijah is waking up so I better get him

God is still God

"being engorged & needing to nurse/pump is like having blueballs, OK??" -how to explain to a man what feeling engorged feels like. That's really random, but so true. I saw it on a forum yesterday and I laughed out loud. Literally.

It has been a rough couple days. Monday night Nick got into a car accident and the hood of our car is all messed up. Still drivable, but kind of scary. Insurance won't cover it but that's another story I'm not at liberty to discuss. It made me so angry. I was mad at Nick, mad at the people for stopping in front of him. We really didn't need this right now. Just when we thought we were making progress and getting ahead BAM! It seems like it always happens to us. But I read two things in the last 12 hours that have put things back into perspective.

This first one I read in my friend Jeremy Brewer's blog. He was a good friend in college and we partnered in prayer for the members of concert band. He also prayed me through my senior speech. Jeremy has had a rough few months (although probably the best thing that happened was his wife becoming pregnant with their first child!!!! YAY!) and this is how he ended his blog describing the last few months:

"This is what I have learned...Good or bad, God is God and is worthy of all praise. I have a choice. I can either focus on my circumstances or focus on Him. I can either complain and worry or give thanks and praise Him. What I choose will ultimately shape and define the kind of person I become in this crucible and refining process"

Thank you Jeremy, for reminding me of that. Sometimes in the situations I have a tendency to forget this and I needed that reminder.

The second thing my friend Laura from moms group sent me. Kristen sent it to us a while back and Laura happened upon it again. It was perfect for me. I have actually started a notebook today putting on things I need to leave for God to take care of. We have taken care of what we could from a human end, now I have to leave it for God. I needed a more tangible way to do that, so I started a notebook.

To: YOU

Date: TODAY

From: GOD

Subject: YOURSELF

Reference: LIFE

This is God. Today I will be handling All of your problems for you. I do Not need your help. So, have a nice day. I love you. P.S.- And, remember... If life happens to deliver a situation to you that you cannot handle, do Not attempt to resolve it yourself! Kindly put it in the SFGTD (something for God to do) box. I will get to it in MY TIME. All situations will be resolved, but in My time, not yours.
Once the matter is placed into the box, do not hold onto it by worrying about it. Instead, focus on all the wonderful things that are present in your life now.
Should you decide to send this to a friend; Thank you. You may have touched their life in ways you will never know!
Now, you have a nice day.

God

I also thought people would enjoy these pictures of my kids. Kylee got into the peanut butter one night. Elijah was overed in mashed potatoes. He loves him some potatoes! The other ones are just because they are cute.

Going Pink

I hate pink. I really do. I buy pink clothes because my color analysis says it's a good color for me. I also buy a lot of pink items, but only when a portion (or all in a few cases) of the sale go toward breast cancer support and research. I don't know too many people who have had breast cancer, and the ones I did know I wasn't close to, but I feel it is an important cause because breast cancer does not discriminate. You don't have to have a family history of breast cancer to get it. Even some men get it. I hope that someday they will have a cure. Maybe someday they will even figure out how to wipe it out completely. I just wish they would have chosen a different color. Like purple. =) Although that belongs to March of Dimes, and having a preemie (though only by a week was she considered a preemie) I also support. I guess I'll just go pink for now.

I got a 3am wake-up call this morning. Not in the form of the phone, but loud annoying pounding on our front door. It freaked me out. Why in the world is someone at my door at 3 am? I looked out the window and there is a large SUV parked in our driveway. I'm flipping out telling Nick not to answer the door without asking who it is first. He opened it and the guy wanted "Tanya with the black car." Someone gave him the wrong address and he should have been across the street instead of at our door. Nick thinks it was a car repo. I know they seem to do it in the middle of the night around here. Why, I don't know. My heart raced for a good 10 minutes afterward. Ugh.

My sweet husband got me a new workout DVD today. He got me biggest loser cardio max. Now, I can work out three times a day with a different dvd. That's my goal anyway...we shall see.

Nick and I have a long list of things to do tonight before we can go to bed. We are going to attempt to get some order back into this house! I think we will stick to the rule (that we broke last night) that at 9:30, all work ceases and we relax.

Chili and Sledding

I think I have been put to shame by other moms*. Some younger. Or moms who have more kids. I am not a cook. Not that I can't cook, because when I do, it usually turns out pretty well. I just don't enjoy it. It's not fun to me. I'd much rather have someone cook my meals for me. That ends up being pretty expensive by the time we pay for food plus the tip, so we don't do that very often. I will admit, we will probably make Little Caesars $5 pizza or take advantage of Nick's 50% off at monicals and have pizza once a week, but that's not bad. $5-8 with leftovers. I am, however, attempting to make a new, a better me. In addition to spending more time with God, working out, eating healthier, and keeping my house in better shape, I am trying to cook more. In the coming weeks I am going to work on making a menu for the entire month, but for now, because of how pay-day falls, and we're waiting for that check, I just did a few days at a time. Not only will it make me a better wife and mom, it will help us save money! I'm happy to say that we have not been to get fast food in over a week. I don't even miss it!
This week we have
Saturday: Chili and cornbread with plenty of chili to freeze and store!
Sunday: Moms group potluck-I only have to make one thing to get many!
Monday-Bubble pizza
Tuesday-Easy Garlic Tilapia, pasta and broccoli.
Wednesday will most likely be leftover night.

Hopefully this will help me get back to be organized. I thrive on organization, but I feel like I'm all out of whack since having kids. I used to be so organized and now I just get so annoyed by the disorganization of everything. Ah!

We took Kylee and Elijah sledding for the first time today. We tried taking them to Dead Man's Hill when we were in Flint over Christmas, but because of the ice storms it wasn't safe to take them down. It was basically a big sheet of ice over the snow. It was quite painful for me, so I have no doubt they'd have gotten hurt. Today we were going to take them to Poop Hill (Yes, that's the name, don't laugh). We were informed that people have been sledding right into the Kankakee River this year, most likely because it's high, so we nixed that and decided to go to the retention pond by where Nick used to live. There was just a little stream of water off to the side leaving a small hill for us to go down. I'm sure that hill seemed big to Kylee and Elijah who had a great time. If it wasn't so windy and they would keep their mittens on, we'd have stayed longer! It was fun! Note to self-get them coats that have adjustable wrists so I can tighten them over their mittens next year!

Now that I have spent a sufficient amount of time sitting here blogging, I need to get back to my regular activities so that I can make sure that tomorrow is a day of rest!

*I could only link so many of you, so I'm sorry if I offended anyone by not linking you too! I admire so many of you, I just had to choose a few.

10 Reasons I Love My Husband

10 Reasons I love my husband (and there are MORE but 10 are enough today)
1. He loves Jesus. He does his best to be a godly husband and dad.
2. He loves me for me. My successes and failures don't change his love for me.
3. He loves our children. He plays with them, bathes them when he can, cleans them up, puts them to bed when he's home, prays with them. He gets up with Elijah in the middle of the night so we can work on weaning him. He is an active role in their lives.
4. He provides for our family. He is very passionate about being our provider. While I have offered on many occasions to get a job in the evening, he prefers to be the one to provide our income. Like most American families, we can't live solely off one income (unless it was about 50% more) right now. One of us has to work in the evenings. He wants me home with our kids. I am glad for that because I like being with them. I would most certainly find a job if he changed his mind, but so far, he has not and I think he secretly likes delivering pizzas.
5. He's a peace-maker. He is a "never go to bed angry" kind of man. If we disagree on something, he likes to get it talked out right away. It drives me nuts in the moment, but in the end, it's always a good thing.
6. He knows me better than I know myself, I think. He knows what I like. He seems to know what I want before I even ask.
7. He's easy going. I don't think our household could handle two uptight adults! He doesn't let the little things bother him.
8. He compliments me. He tells me things that I, as a woman, need to hear. When he says it, I believe him.
9. He is very talented!
10. He is supportive. From the beginning we have agreed on how we wanted our marriage and parenting to be. When I considered formula-feeding with Kylee, he was supportive. When I had to stop breast-feeding her because I lost supply, he was supportive. When I chose to breastfeed past a year, he was supportive. After learning our kids slept better in the early months by co-sleeping, he was supportive. When we have troubles with his mom, he's supportive and always sticks up for me, us and our little family.

This is the man I will love forever!

Showers of Money

I have so much to do today, I shouldn't be blogging. But I am. =) And I've also read a couple, but I think Christine's is probably one of my favorites. I think she makes me laugh almost everytime. The times she doesn't are the times that it's a more serious post. I especially like her "Not Me Mondays." If I could be as witty and creative, I think I might try them.

I should be cleaning my incredibly disorganized and messy house right now. We had planned on doing it yesterday, but spent the afternoon at my mother-in-law's instead. I need to clean every single room in this house, but I think today, I'll let the living room and kitchen go until my bedroom is done. I hate going to bed in a messy room, and contrary to what you would see now, I do think it should be the cleanest room in our house! That is our place of refuge, and with the exception of a middle of the night nursing session and Saturday and Sunday family time all snuggled in our bed (or climbing the headboard to see out the window) our bedroom is off-limits to children. I think I just may surprise my husband with a floor he can walk on without tripping over the piles of clothes I desperately need to put away so I can find things again. I love the holiday season, but I do not like how I let myself get so behind! If I feel like it after that, I'll move to the kitchen.

Lately, as a part of making over myself, I have spent much time in prayer (why didn't I do this before, I have asked myself MANY times) over the past week or so. I've been praying specifically for a few things, other things not so specifically. I have been praying that God would help us in the area of finances as we have made a vow to manage our money MUCH better this year. We realized we actually have more than we thought (still not a lot of money, but more), we just didn't manage it well. Anyway, I have also asked to go give us an increase in our finances because we really do need to find a bigger place to live in the coming months or year. Well, last night Nick used his mom's car when he delivered pizzas so I could run some errands. Of all the cash we had between us (again, wasn't much because we had used what we did have to stock our diapers and fridge for a few days) there was only one $5 bill. He only went on 3 deliveries (thanks to the delivery driver who decided to just show up and write himself in), using less than $5 worth gas on Karen's car, but gave her the $5 because she did let him use her car, which caused her to have to go shopping with me and two insanely grumpy toddlers. This morning, I let our dog, Barrett, outside. It was probably the third or fourth time this morning, and I noticed a $5 bill sitting on our porch. I immediately emailed my hubby to be sure he actually remembered to give the money to his mom, and he said he did. I have no idea where this money came from, buy Nick said God. I'm goign to go with that unless someone tells me they left $5 on our front porch. Stranger yet, is Barrett didn't try to eat it since i noticed it when I was letting him IN, not OUT.

I suppose I should be a good wife now, and go clean something. Or perhaps I'll procrastinate a little longer and read books to my kids to give Barrett a break from being climbed on. Or maybe I'll just turn Dora or Diego back on...that should be a part of Not me monday!

Looking ahead to what will be a great year!

Looking back at 2008, I think it's safe to say I will not miss it. Yes, I have enjoyed watching my children grow and learn, but 2007 and 2008 have been the toughest years I've ever had to endure. I'm glad they are both gone, and I'm not sure why, but I have a feeling 2009 is going to bring great things! There are going to be changes the Cunningham household as 2009 unfolds! Stick around and you'll get a front row seat!

I was searching online yesterday and found a site that tells you what to read in order to read the Bible through in a year in order of events, not books of the Bible. I'm already excited and it's only been one day. I was praying before I read that God would show me something new since I've read the first three chapters of Genesis many times before. The verses kept standing out to me that man was put here to work, and woman was put here to help man. I think that that will mean something very different to each and every person, but it gave me something to think about in my marriage. What ways can I be a better helpmate to my husband? He works so hard outside the home that I know that keeping up laundry and the house is one way. I haven't been too great about that the past year, but this year is going to be different! Starting monday (because it's easier at the start of the week) I'm going to schedule our days so I can get specific things done each day and so our kids are on a schedule. I'm going to do my best to be the best wife for my husband, and to help him make our family the best it can be.

I also read a little section in Love Beyond Reason. I have read part of this book before, but it was five years ago! I've changed so much since then! But it never ceases to amaze me that God loves me like he does. God loves me right where I am. He gave his ONLY SON so that my sins could be forgiven! I just got goosebumps writing that. How amazing is that? I know we've been taught that our entire lives, but having my own children makes it so much more real! No way would I give my son up (or my daughter!) for someone who would hurt me over and over, maybe disown me, much less an entire world of someones! That is a love that is indescribable, a love only God can give. I've learned a lot of about love becoming a wife and then a mom. I've learned that the more you love, the more love you have to give. The more love you give, the more love your heart seems to have. And people just look happier when they are full of love! I'm sure I'll go through seasons of anger or questioning or doubt because I'm human and I can't see the whole picture that God can see, but I'm glad to know I have a God who loves me where I am, but doesn't want me to stay here. He wants me to get better. He loves me the way I am, but refuses to leave me this way. I hope that I can be a daughter God will be proud of. I haven't been, but maybe this year my "artwork" will be on God's fridge!

I forgot...
My husband did a fabulous thing when we were in Chicago the other night. Not only did he give away his yummy orange peel beef left-overs to a homeless man, he also bought another man dinner. We took him into subway and got him a footlong and a bag of chips. Sure it was only about 7.50, but this is a tight week since it was my birthday and rent week. And if this guy had a friend, Nick was going to buy one for his friend too. I think he was a little nervous about it because every little bit counts this week with it being just after the holidays, but I truly believe God is going to bless my husband for being obedient and helping out someone in need. We've been helped by others when we needed it, now, even when it might be just a little thing, it is our turn to start giving back. I married a good man. We never give money, but usually we take sandwiches to give out. This time we didn't because we didn't have a stroller to store them in. I'm glad God gave us that opportunity and used us to help that man