Sometimes I just want to pout

Sometiems it seems like we'll never catch a break in life. It seems things have been rather difficult for us since about the middle of our first year of marriage. Nick lost his job, he found another one after a few months, then I quit mine after returning from maternity leave to find a policy set in place that affected me and only me (a completely unfair policy at that), we made a move to Arizona that resulted in me being severely depressed, we found out we were pregnant with Elijah when we had very little money and were unsure of our future (turned out to be a great thing, obviously), we moved back, our housing fell through, Nick found a job, but Cigna pretty much sucks-but at least it was work. We found new housing after 3 months.

Things finally started to look up for us. Then we received our first water bill after EIGHT months of living here. If you live in this area, you may have figured out how ridiculous Aqua Illinois is. They came to shut our water off when we had only received a bill a week or so before. Of course, they refused to accept less than the entire bill in full, even though they admitted that it was their fault. It seems that everytime we start to even think we can get ahead, something else happens. They happen pretty regularly at our house. It's like Murphy has taken up permanent residence with our family. Too bad we can't claim him on our taxes.

If it's not one thing, it's another. Nick got into a car accident, fore-going our dream of having two cars (since one would be completely paid for). These are all only a short list of all the stuff that keeps happening.

Last night Nick opened the hood of our van and found that a tube was cut in half. This was not just something that happened over time. It was a slice, like someone took a knife to it. Luckily it was not a huge deal, and the guys at autozone gave us something to replace it till we can order the real part (shouldn't be an expensive fix), but while they were fitting that hose, they found something that can be VERY expensive. The strut towers are all rusted, and eventually, if we hit a bump just right, they said the whole front end can drop! What?!?!?! This sucks. This is supposed to be my reliable vehicle!

I will admit, I was mad at Nick first. He should have checked for that when we bought it. Then I thought about it and realized he probably didn't think to check that. Then I was mad and pouted most of the evening because we were supposed to go to IHOP for free pancakes, but changed our minds because now we have a new thing to pay for. Sure the pancakes would have been free, but what about tip, and the donation they were asking for? Not so much. So we came home and i made pancakes.

Nick kept sending Kylee over to give me hugs. That was cute. I'd much rather he learn to poop out money like Christine's husband! =) After dinner, rather than working out like I wanted to, I sat on the couch with my Bible for a while. I read, I prayed. I hope the number our landlord gave us will give us some hope for a lesser price to fix this problem. I am being hopeful, although past experience tells me that something else will happen. I'm trying to remain positive today. Do you even notice how hard it is to be positive when you are exhausted? I didn't get a restful sleep last night, lots of dreaming that I don't remember, so that left me feeling exhausted and barely able to wake up today.

I offered to give Nick the money I've been setting aside for my girls day in Chicago. Secretly, I'm hoping he tells me to keep it and still go. I want to contribute, but I also need a day out with the girls. Does this make me a bad wife? I hope not. It's not like I have a lot of money set aside, but I'm a mom. How often do I get to do something that is just for me? But if we need it, then I will give it.

On the up-side-it's Lent. No more sweets for me! Not only am I hoping this time helps improve my relationship with God, but also my waistline!