I want to be real

I have so much to say, but I'm not sure how to say it all.  I had a whole post written.  I deleted it because I don't want to feel so vulnerable.  I want to be completely honest and real, and maybe no one actually reads this so I could be. But what if someone does?  Will they be quick to judge or try to look at it through our eyes and see what was going on?  I want to share my Arizona story.  Someday.  I think so many were very quick to judge when we moved back to Illinois after three months.  If only they knew, maybe they'd be a little more sympathetic.  If only they all knew where I'd be right now if we had stayed.  I wish I could even tell my parents why we couldn't stay.  I wish I could tell my sisters.  I hope someday I have the courage to share an event that, while it sucked, it has been shaping me into the person I am.